Keeping the Balance in EFT Sessions: What Great EFT Therapists Do | EFT Trainer Marianne Gustafsson

Summary

Key Points

• Balance is achieved by being emotionally present and ensuring each partner feels heard, not by equal speaking time, and adjustments are made based on therapy stage and each partner’s needs. 5:27
• Therapists should actively acknowledge the non‑focused partner through eye contact, gentle touch, using their name, and regular check‑ins to maintain presence for both individuals. 9:19
• In early or high‑intensity sessions, spending more time with the more reactive partner is acceptable if the other partner is validated and reassured. 23:41
• Supervisory support, self‑awareness of therapist anxiety, and the option of additional individual work help manage fears of imbalance and ensure a secure therapeutic base. 29:30
• De‑escalation and stabilization of both partners’ nervous systems form the foundation for stage two re‑engagement work. 32:47
• The “tango” enactment processes both the risk‑taking and receiving partners together to deepen intimacy and promote secure attachment. 34:49
• Pursuer softening requires careful, paced interventions, as it often takes longer than withdrawal work and should not be rushed. 36:43
• Cultural, diversity, and safety considerations must be integrated into the therapist’s balancing strategy to build alliance and predictability. 45:23